While on the way up to my friend's house on Thursday night, my buddy, Michael and I were talking about how the weather can just suddenly change on you. Making some forecasts for days totally wrong. It was just an interesting concept, because not too long after it started, it started to hit like a freight train. We were getting poured on as if we were a dehydrated sunflower. It was a really hard rain, and there was a lot of lightlning. A lot of really fast, really bright lightning.
While Michael and I were talking about how it was so nice outside during that same day, but then the rains and storms come randomly at night, sort of taking me by surprise, Michael's first reaction was "And we question the power of God."
As you can imagine, as with many, many other things, this got me to thinking. I started to think about how Michael was absolutely right. We do question God's power a lot. We can underestimate it a lot too. I think we like to question it a lot though. We don't really see that God has the power to do what He wants, when He wants. One of the things that made me really believe that Michael was right, was when the lightning was so bright, it felt like we were driving in the middle of the day. That means it was close, and it was powerful. This kind of left me in awe, because God literally had the power to totally end Michael and I there. With one fell move, it could have been over for us. This is a really scary thought, because you never really understand your life until you realize that God has the power to completely take it away. He doesn't need a knife, a gun, or any other type of weapon though. He can just kill us, when He chooses.
It made me think, how many times in my life do I really question the power of God. Not even just the fact that He has the power to kill me right now, but the other things like, "Can He really help me through this hard time?" Or, "I just don't think that God can handle this" We do it all the time without even thinking about it really. We just don't think that God really is THAT big. Well, I've got news for pretty much everyone, myself included: God could make a lightning storm come in the middle of a drought, strike every one of us down, and be done with it, but because of His immense love for us, He doesn't do that, thankfully.
When I showed up at Campaigners, fashionably late, because of 7 on 7, Susan was talking about how we question the power of God all the time as well. It was just a really strong topic that night for some odd reason. Oh well, it was definitely something that I needed to hear because I thought about it all night, and I guess God was trying to tell me that I need to stop second-guessing Him, and just give Him the problems that I have. It's the best way to get through them, and truthfully, He's gotten me through bigger problems than the ones I'm having right now, even though the biggest problem, as long as certain things go right, will be solved in a matter of weeks. I just am sick of not giving God enough of myself. I don't think that I really grasp the whole idea of worship anymore.
Worship was created in order for us to have a way to fully surrender ourselves to God. There are many different forms of worship, but I can tell you that I don't do any of them, enough of the time anyway. I just think that I have become so lukewarm with my walk with Christ that I have begun to miss out on the great things in life that I should be experiencing with Him, but I'm not because I don't think that I am giving God enough credit that He so rightfully deserves. I really think that if I fully surrendered myself to the Lord everyday, then I would not be missing out on so many things that I do tend to miss out on just because of the fact that I am not giving it my all right now.
This is one reason that I am glad that football is starting back up, because I do realize that when we half the pre-practice talks about things, it really opens my eyes to things that I really don't see anywhere else. It has really improved my faith, because I knew that walking into the season on JV, that I had to be a leader, but then I realized that it was pretty much just me, since no one else on the team really knew the Lord. This made me wary of the fact that pretty much the only thing that I had to work with was the weightlifting strength that I had, and the power of the Lord. I really wish that I could have that back, and I know that it is definitely mine for the taking. It's just like of my my favorite songs right now says,
"Willl you take me as I am?
I know the way I'm living is wrong
But I can't change on my own,
Tryna make it alone. I wonder
How could you love me with my life so ugly?
But you came down and died for me.
Will you take me as I am?"
This song is more about the fact that there is nothing that we can do that will earn us salvation, but accepting Christ as our Lord and Savior, but I think it still applies to the fact that not only does God have the power to kill us all, but He also has, and used the power to redeem us all. Because of God, sending His One and only Son down to die for our sins, we now have a free gift that can never be returned. We don't have to take it, but it's always there if we want it. We don't have to live in the bondage of slavery anymore. We don't have to let earthly things get to us. God has set us free. Therefore, we should rejoice. God used His all-powerful, all loving power to save us, instead of doing what pretty much any human would have done, and annihilated everyone. I know that if I were God, and I were truly angry with someone, their chances would be done, I probably would have dropped the hammer. Then again, this is why I am not God.
Well, as much as I would love to keep writing, my throat needs to rest from inhaling bonfire smoke. Talk to you guys later.
I love you guys
TJ
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